Sunday Morning ~ Boosts
January 13, 2019
I’ve kind of put my life on hold for the year hoping to be able to go back to Malawi to push this midwifery ward a little further toward the goal post. I believe in this. I have a fantasy that it will take hold and be a model for all over the world. I said exactly that when I was presenting it to a class of interior design students at Jefferson University in Philadelphia this week. I started out saying it is a model that could easily be replicated, and someone asked, “Where? Africa?” I said, “The World!” at which point there was a little twittering about my delusion of grandeur. But it could! It should!
I’ve been waiting to hear about returning to Blantyre and was getting very discouraged about it’s chances of becoming reality. It seems our country’s plight right now is overshadowing everything that could be done to improve life on a global stage. I was starting to lose hope and steam. As I was driving to the University with my friend on Friday morning I said, “I woke up this morning thinking, ‘What the fuck am I doing?’ I’m not getting a salary running around the country pitching this. I’m having fun, but at some point I need to get a little compensation to pay my bills and see something tangible come out of it. I was starting to think I should just go find a job and say I tried. I was also feeling like the energy surrounding the book had run it’s course and maybe I should think of some other place to set my focus.
Then I had a conference call that was productive and encouraging. I AM going back to Blantyre for two weeks and will see what we can get accomplished as far as writing up policies and procedures, finding a project manager who will be responsible for making the wheels turn, and set some goals for the rest of the year. It was a little booster shot. Then I met with the students and got a huge injection of boost. Their response to the project about picked me up out of my seat. It’s thrilling for me to see a new generation of responsible citizens who want to use their talents and energy for the good of mankind. I felt totally energized again. I am going to give this everything I’ve got and reevaluate after this trip. Two weeks away! Yikes! It’s so often like this, wait wait wait, then hurry up and go!
I left Philadelphia and headed toward Reading, Pennsylvania where a book group consisting of four couples read my book and invited me to come to their discussion. Another booster shot was waiting for me there! It makes me so happy to hear someone say, “I felt like I knew all these people by the end of your book. I cared about what happened to them.” That is the absolute pinnacle of what I’d hoped for. The book group consisted of people in all walks of life, varied professions, both male and female, and had similar feelings about reading it. A couple of them said they could see it as a movie, which, of course, I’ve already mentally cast. I’ve got my dress picked out for the academy awards (the author gets a ticket, right?), and I’ll finally meet Meryl Streep when she plays me! Ok, let me reel this in a bit, and think of a few more ways to get book groups to read it and recommend it to others. Back to earth.
My hosts were over the top with hospitality: introducing me to people, showing me the surroundings, taking me on two hikes and one run, a wine tasting, dancing, dinner in a castle, and great conversations. I’m exhausted! For me there is much more reward in all this than money or fame…but I’d still like Oprah to get her chops into it.
Now I’ve got to get my shit together to be ready to head out in two weeks. Packing should be pretty simple, hopefully the weather cooperates so my little plane leaves Bar Harbor on time, then back to a place that pulls at me, though I have some trepidation about “you can’t go home again” syndrome. I’ll try to be realistic, try to achieve some goals, try to help midwifery take one more step up the mountain, and pray that women’s lives improve because of it. I’m giving it a try. It feels right. Plus, I can’t wait to see my colleagues again! I love those women!
And in the meantime, I’ve got lots of women friend energy coming my way this week and I’m going to soak up every bit of it.
Love to all,