Sunday Morning~ Can't Sleep

Every time I get ready to travel I think I’ll get a good night’s sleep and finish the final details in the morning right before I leave.  Why don’t I ever learn? Ever? I’ll be exhausted and fall into bed thinking I’ll be asleep instantly and then start thinking, “Do I have enough cat food for the next three weeks?” Then I toss and turn and think I should just get up and check, but no, I need my sleep! So go to sleep!  And then I start thinking, “I need to drive for five hours!  Go to sleep!  Wait, did I leave laundry in the dryer?  Or worse, the washer? Do I remember my PIN number?  Did I change it recently?”

Then I start counting the hours of sleep I’ll get if I fall asleep RIGHT NOW! Then wonder if that decaf was really decaf and who I should be angry at about that.  And then wonder how cranky I’ll be, but I’m going on a great trip!  This is nothing to complain about!  But my little world here needs so much attention, or so I think.  And then I think, “Really, don’t you go more than two weeks when you are home without watering every single plant?  It probably is more like a month. And everything is fixable and the garden will do it’s thing and new adventures are calling….so GO TO SLEEP!”  If I were two would I be crying right now?

Oh my God, then there’s the blog!  I was going to get up and write all kinds of inspiring things about friendship and trust and poverty and greed.  And then I think, “Wait a minute, should I print out all those reservation details in case my cell phone dies?  And what is the absolute latest to be on the road?” And I think, “I’ll be so tired that I’ll write crap and won’t have time to edit it and everyone will think I’m an idiot.” And then I think, “Wait, who even reads this?”  And then I remember, “Oh right, there are people who don’t like things that I write”, and I think, “Really?  People actually care about what I write?” And while I get paranoid about what I wrote thinking it was harmless and just my opinion so I can write whatever I want, right? Then I think, “Stop thinking about this and go to sleep!”

And I did. I think.  ‘Cuz I had a dream, so I must have slept. Anyway, next week from a Swiss Alp from my phone.  We’ll see how that works!  That woke me up!